Cultivating Gratitude in Your Marriage

We know that gratitude plays a key role in our wellbeing. Imagine how powerful it can be in your relationship!

Thanking one another helps us to focus on what we love about our spouse. It increases empathy and changes our perspective from what we need as individuals, to what positive things are happening in the present moment. Practicing this small habit can make a huge difference in the way we communicate and connect with one another!

I honestly don’t remember making a conscious effort to practice gratitude when we first got married. I hope we did! But I know that over the past few years, it’s played a big role in how we communicate. We say thank you to each other at least 30 times a day!I love when he acknowledges something I did. He’s basically telling me, “Honey-I noticed,” and that means so much-especially if it’s about the dishes. I hate doing the dishes! And on the flip side, when I say thanks, it makes me feel happier!

So where do you begin?

Here are some ways to practice gratitude in your marriage:

  1. Start small

    Say thank you for the small stuff. Did your spouse change the toilet paper roll? Empty the dishwasher? Water the plants? Carry in the groceries? You could seriously thank each other for EVERYTHING. If something was done around the house, and you didn’t do it, say thank you!

  2. Keep a gratitude jar

    If you like to physically write it out-awesome! You can write out your thank-you on a slip of paper and place it in the jar. When the jar fills up, sit down together and read each one. Or choose special day to do this, like your anniversary, Christmas or Valentine’s Day. You can also keep a few pieces and make a little book that you add to each year.

  3. Add a gratitude log to your love note journal.

    You can use the love note journal for anything, cute pictures, sweet reminders, funny stories, love letters. But if you’re a list person, flip to the back of y’all’s journal, write gratitude in big letters, and start listing out everything you appreciate your spouse doing.

  4. Remember actions and attributes.

    You’ve thanked your spouse for all the little things, now say thank you for your spouse is! What are the attributes you appreciate and how does that make you a better person?


Cultivating a habit of giving thanks is not only what we’re called to do, but what we WANT to do for a strong connection! Even if you and your honey aren’t “words of affirmation” people, it can still make a big difference in your life. Have you thanked your spouse today? Leave a comment!

With Love,

Toni